a thankful heart.

This year, I have been working through the Bible reading plan that I found on Jami Nato's blog: The Nato's.  While I am not NEARLY on track with the months, it’s been great for me to actually see my progress and feel like I am making headway on something I’ve wanted to do for a long time—read the Bible cover to cover.  I’m embarrassed to even admit that I haven’t!  

I’ve been in Leviticus recently and I found myself skimming over the passages thinking “why does this matter? this doesn’t apply to me, maybe I should just move ahead to another book.”  This week, though, was a light bulb, ah-ha, eye-opening experience moment for me.  As I was reading through Leviticus 14 about Cleansing from Infectious Skin Diseases, I got it.  

This applies DEEPLY to me.  

No, I do not need a treatment for a skin disease or to have the priest sacrifice a sin offering on my behalf.  BUT I DO need Jesus’s blood to cover me so I can be in God’s perfect presence. Lately I’ve really taken that for granted.  

I grew up in church.  I know the stories; I know Jesus died for my sins but the true weight of that statement, that action filled with love by both the Father and the Son has not sunk in until far too recently.  Without Jesus we would be subject to these laws—constantly trying to cleanse and purify ourselves in order to have a relationship with the God that created us.  We would have to watch what we eat, what we wear, how we behave, what comes out of our mouths, who we surround ourselves with, rely on a priest to help purify us, and on and on.  Jesus died to cover us with his blood son we can appear perfect in our perfect God's sight and so that there is nothing we can DO to be acceptable or closer to God.  We can access Him and talk to Him at any time.  The CREATOR of the WORLD.  LOVES US.  

Let that sink in.  How amazing is that? 

In business terms, this is like having direct access to the CEO of your corporation without any fear or anxiety that he is too busy for you, doesn't care about your little problems, doesn't know you from Jane that works across from you.  I think about past jobs where I got tongue-tied when someone at a senior level walked by my desk--always wanting to appear busy, valuable, smart, etc.  God doesn't ask any of this of us.  He wants to know us intimately, to have a deep relationship with us.  Sometimes it feels too good to be true. 

The gospel has really come alive for me in the last six months.  I have always been a Christian, have always had a relationship with Christ but have never fully understood grace or how undeserved grace is.  I was broken this year.  Losing a baby at the end of January rocked my world.  It’s been a healing and surrendering process.  Now, I can truly say that I trust God.  I believe He loves me.  I believe He has a perfect plan.  I believe Jesus died so that I can have life, and life to the fullest.  The life He has planned for me may not match the picture in my head.  

I can guarantee it will be better. 

“For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation will separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.” Romans 8: 38-39